Science? Where we’re going, we don’t need… science.
Previous segment here.
[“Editorials” in green brackets]
Chapter Two
“Good Luck, Sergeant!”
Canor walked to the debriefing room. He walked quickly, as he was asked there by the Felnak (Admiral) Himself! He had a feeling it was about last night’s battle. He hadn’t exactly had permission or authority to order the men where to fire! [Whoopsie! That pesky chain of command!] He knocked, then entered the D-room. [Debriefing Room, I guess.] Admiral Lathor was a Upion. He was thin as a whip, sort of pale yellow, and had three vine-like tentacles for arms. The room smelled somewhat swampy. The Felnak turned to him. At least Canor thought it turned to him. The Upion spoke into the language translating device. “Congratulations,” the machine said, “Due to your vast knowledge of Ships, quick reflexes (and thinking) You have been promoted to Sergeant and have the rare chance to pilot one of the UniGovernments small, two- & one-man fighters. Do you accept? “ [A crushing blow, rivaled only by the death penalty] Canor’s jaw hung open for a second before he remembered himself and shut it. Canor thought for a minute then stuttered, “Y-yes, sir.” Lathor sort of chuckled, then said, “Good. You will pack your things tonight , and tomorrow you will be sent through the Ka’abi-holted [Silly name #1!] to Asteroid 15478625a, 586413per982 [Good thing Upions can remember huge, random strings of characters.] and will be picked up by a Dotu Sek. His name is Hamert ghan Folluji. [Moving on…] He will tell you his name, and take you the rest of the way to the secret training base. Good Luck, Sergeant! “ [there’s no reason for ending and then starting the quotation marks here, but whatever?] “and by the way, nice job on the bridge last night .”
“ Yes Sir!,” said Canor, “and, If I may, sir, thank you.” Canor waited until he was alone in the hall before he let out a wild yell. [w00t]
Chapter Three
The Sinister Meeting
[Dun dun duuuuuun!]
“Access Granted” the computer said, hollowly. The door slid aside. Canor half-ran, half-walked into the ship’s moleculizer. This would take him anywhere on the ship, or down to the surface if they were close enough. His body froze in a reverse silhouette; and as lights swirled around to the center, it vanished. [I still like this visual effect, BTW] The door closed behind him. He reappeared in another, and walked out into the hall. He went quickly. He did NOT want to be late. Two rights and left later, he was there. [About time.] He inserted his hand in what looked like a dent in the wall. There was a BBBRRRRRTTTT and an arch appeared out of nowhere. he walked through. With an EER it closed again. [PEW PEW BANG KLIK BWEEEOW] A prerecorded voice spoke. The Ka’abi-Holted will begin shortly. A circular rainbow appeared. [No, it’s not, thanks anyway] The different colors of light started to spin at different speeds. They slowly collapsed toward the middle, turned white, then exploded into color and sound. It compressed into a coin-shaped viewscreen through which Canor walked. As BRIGHT lights [try a dimmer switch] swirled around him, he felt tingly. Then, everything came into focus, and, he was THERE.
THERE was [in bold, underlined italics. It’s an asteroid in the middle of nowhere. Wow!] a small, 2-mile-around asteroid, with a low atmosphere and gravity. as soon as Canor got there, He sensed He could fly. So he did. [But of course] Then another K.A.H. came in. Deciding better safe than sorry, He Quickly leaped behind a rock. Suddenly he saw a figure appear.
It was small, but there was a sense of evil around it. It had exceptionally large, large Ears. [Stay away! That rabbit is dynamite!] But there was more.
A Large,Dark slender form slipped silently through through the disk, which Quickly [Q!] dissipated. Other K.A.H.’s soon came in, bearing similarly sinister people. The slender one walked up to an extremely large Boulder, uttered something unintelligible, and a high technology, high security door, and punched in a number sequence, DNA scan, and after completing several other security features, gained access. [I’m not sure if I’m talking about the security, the door, or the guy here] After all the other forms did so too, the door slid closed and disappeared. If you looked closely at the area it shimmered. Just a little, but enough. that meant they had cloaking! He had thought that hadn’t been developed yet! Hmmmmmmm…. [howcuriousitmustbeRomulans] He thought he recognized the tall dark ominous one… That was it!!! [!!!1!exclamationpoints!!1] the leader of the Herbol Horde! He had to do something! then a K.A.H. appeared. Canor didn’t have a chance to take cover. All of a sudden a flash came through it. Canor was alarmed He took a chance and let out a super sonic screech. [Remember that? Also, remember sound in space?] The flash halted abruptly. Then quickly; vanished without a trace. Then reappeared right beside him. Canor jumped ten feet in the air. And stayed there. [and then: a short sentence] he darted behind the K.A.H. the THING came through. He had heard of a rumor that if you do some thing to a K.A.H. it will dissipate immediately so he stuck his arm in the back and snapped his fingers, then thought of something upsetting, therefore changing color. he barely had time to withdraw his arm before it shut down. [And this years huge, rambling sentence award goes to…] Now without getting into the physics to much about how a K.A.H. works, [*snigger*] It basically takes sound and light and when you step in it converts you into sound and light and then duplicates the sound and light at the other point and then reconverts your special sounds and lights into you. [SCIENCE! Bill Nye, eat your heart out.] A little wacky, but the best they’d come up with yet. So when Canor snapped his fingers He upset the delicate balance needed for sound, and by changing color interrupted the even more delicate balance of color and light. because that could kill or maim a person completely in it, safety protocol made so everything coming through was sent back and as soon as everyone was back, it shut down. [Me. I get the award.] therefore when Canor removed his arm it shut down. Back to the story. [Too late, I’ve committed suicide due to the “science” in this science fiction.] So then Canor ducked behind a boulder. He called out to the being, asking his name. the thing hesitated, Then shouted out, Hamert ghan Folluji, what’s yours. [Also somebody stole my quotation marks] Canor realized this was his contact! [D’oh!] Of course it was against regulations to reveal your name to an unknown person but still, it was him. [Then how the heck were they supposed to meet in the first place?] Canor could tell it was the truth. It was like He had a lie detector inside his head. [Did I forget to mention that?] So he came out from behind the boulder with his hands raised showing He had no weapons. [Way to come, prepared] “Canor, and have I got news for you!
Tales in Progress 
Leave a comment